I’m here with Sharme Rowlar, head and founder of the Haze Institution. For those who don’t know, the HI works to learn more about the Haze: what it is, where it came from, and ultimately, is there anything down there?
So, Sharme, why don’t you tell us a little bit about yourself?
Sharme: I still can’t believe you managed to get an interview with me. But, a deal’s a deal, I suppose. Hi, I’m Sharme. Like you said, I lead the research on the Haze. What else do you want to know about me? Or is that sufficient?
Me: I suppose that will do. Let’s jump into the most important questions, the one everyone is dying to know. Due the the nature of the Haze, how do you plan on ever finding out what’s down in the valley?
Sharme: Obviously we can’t just dance our way down there. That would be suicide. Although I suppose it might be a beneficial sacrifice if some people tried going down there unaided… But I digress. As you know – at least I hope you’re smart enough to, anyway – the Haze is toxic. Spend more than a few minutes breathing that stuff, and your lungs will collapse and you will die. End of story.
Fortunately, I believe there is another way to go down there – a way that doesn’t involve dying. It involves filters. For your face. A special mask that can filter out the toxicity of the Haze, leaving the wearer with pure oxygen.
Me: Very cool. And how does this technology work?
Sharme: Ha! How should I know? I’m only doing this interview to get funding. You know that. Without the proper resources, I can’t make a decent prototype to save my life. Which it would, I’ll have you know.
Me: (Laughing) I suppose it would. So what’s so important about learning about the Haze? It’s been around for hundreds of years. Why start now? Don’t you think others have tried to go down there before you?
Sharme: I’m almost certain they have. But they were idiots. They knew nothing about its nature, about where it came from, and any other simple fact about the Haze.
Me: So tell us. What is its nature?
Sharme: I don’t know! I don’t have funding, remember? Until I get funding, I’m stuck. But I tell you – whoever’s reading this interview – if you help me learn about the Haze, I will make you famous. You will have more than enough money to buy whatever luxury you want. I just ask one thing: Let me keep one artifact – one finding – for myself. Everything else is yours.
Me: Um…Alright then. Would you mind telling us what it is you expect to find down in the Haze, Doctor Rowlar?
Sharme: Of course I mind! Not that I have any idea what might be down there to begin with. I just know that any place enshrouded in such mystery as the Haze must have treasures untold. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m late for a meeting. (Stands)
Me: Oh, uh…of course. Thank you for allowing me to (door slams) interview you.
Sharme is a bit of a handful.